One Instant

It’s amazing to me how you become a parent in literally an instant. One minute I was laying in the hospital bed freaking out asking the doctors if he was out yet, the next I was a mom. Unfortunately I was on all sorts of drugs, but still an amazing experience. Now my son is only 6 months old, and I feel like a mom. I don’t think of myself as Kat, I think of myself as Mitch’s mommy. I love it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still me, but I’m not at the same time. The last thing I think of before bed is Mitch. It’s crazy how I went from being miserably pregnant to loving this child in such a way that only a parent can understand. It’s amazing how that one instant, becoming a parent, changes your entire perspective on life and the world. I look at my own mom, my grandparents, even my husband in a different light now that I am Mommy.
Think about yourself when you were a child. What did you think about your parents? *or in my case grandparents* I can’t answer the question for you, but I thought of them as responsible ‘adults.’ They were my grandparents. That was their job, to be my grandparents. I never thought about life for them before me *or even after I went to bed at night*. Now that I am Mommy, I find myself wondering what they are really like. I feel like I understand them better and I really wonder how many times that my grandma said she wouldn’t tell my grandpa about whatever I did, she did tell Poppy, but he just kept his mouth shut.
Obviously my son is only 6 months old and he doesn’t really do anything bad yet *ok that he knows is bad* but when he’s older I am sure I will tell Adam about all his exploits even if I promise I won’t. Does that make me a bad person? I don’t think it does. I think it makes me a person that is not just Mitch’s mom, even though, until he has his own child, to him that is what I will be.